Sunday, December 23, 2012

Tired


I am tired.

I am tired of being pregnant.

I am tired of fighting so hard to advocate for my children.

I am tired of pushing for A’s acknowledgment.

I am tired of feeling so sad.

I am tired of unpredictable moods and emotions.

I am tired of just getting through each day.

I am tired of living in the throes of anxiety.

I am just plain tired.



I wish I could lie down, close my eyes and wake up in two weeks time.
Posted by at 12:18 PM
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6 comments:

  1. Catherine WDecember 23, 2012 at 1:48 PM

    I'm so sorry. I remember feeling this way towards the end of my pregnancy with R. Sometimes I still feel like this. That I am just tired. Of feeling sad. Of asking other people to remember.

    And at this time of year? Well, I simply can't imagine.

    I wish that I could grant your wish.

    Hang on in there. The tired me of mid-2011 is holding you up with sympathy and the me of late-2012 is holding you up and remembering A xo

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  2. Mama BearDecember 23, 2012 at 3:45 PM

    I wish you a fast, peaceful and restful next two weeks. Remembering A this Christmas. I don't know if you like Mumford and Sons, but a few of their songs helped us get through those last few weeks (okay that sounds silly, but somehow it helped me relax, breath and keep trudging along) xoxo

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  3. March is for daffodilsDecember 24, 2012 at 7:34 AM

    Sending love and hugs and here for you whenever you need to rant or complain, be scared or anxious. I hope the next few days are as peaceful as possible for you and E. Remembering A this Christmas Eve morning.

    ReplyDelete
  4. RenelDecember 24, 2012 at 10:14 AM

    Oh the anxiety I think is the thing that really makes you tired. Because that high level of arousal for months and months on end is absolutely EXHAUSTING! I know the worst of it is when you're so incredibly close. You can hardly sleep because you mush be watchful...always watchful. Sending you some love. I know nothing in you will rest until this baby is here.

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  5. SuzanneDecember 24, 2012 at 5:51 PM

    Oh, sweet friend. I'm so sorry. I hope you can do as little as necessary for as long as you need to do as little as necessary. Just the anxiety of loss is sometimes too much to bear, let alone the anxiety of late pregnancy, the sheer fatigue. Take such good care of yourself, mama. Be gentle and patient. And do whatever you need to do <3

    ReplyDelete
  6. Mama BearDecember 29, 2012 at 11:27 AM

    Just wanted to say that I've been thinking about you and hoping for bits of energy and peace. These last couple of weeks are so hard!

    ReplyDelete

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